


No Cure for Queer

by AlabasterInk



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Gen, Homophobic Language, Hopper is a typical 1980s man, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Period-Typical Homophobia, Will and Hopper bonding, but Hopper is going to try because he is a good man, will is gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-20
Updated: 2019-06-20
Packaged: 2020-05-15 04:26:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19288096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlabasterInk/pseuds/AlabasterInk
Summary: Will Byers had about thirty minutes between realizing that the butterflies in his stomach came from appreciating Mike’s smile a little too much, to walking into his house and hearing Hopper say, “…wrong, Joyce. A guy with another guy. We used to arrest queers, you know…”And it all went downhill from there.





	No Cure for Queer

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! I hope you're all doing well! So just as a forewarning, this does have period-typical homophobia and homophobic language. I really wanted to explore the potential relationship between Will and Hopper, because if he and Joyce do get together then Will will be just as much Hopper's son as Eleven will be Joyce's daughter. Plus, Hopper has literally helped save his life twice and spent a year going to the doctor's with him. And I really wanted to explore that. I'm not 100% happy with this, but I think that may be just because I've read it so many times. 
> 
> I hope you all enjoy!

Will Byers had about thirty minutes between realizing that the butterflies in his stomach came from appreciating Mike’s smile a little too much, to walking into his house and hearing Hopper say, “…wrong, Joyce. A guy with another guy. We used to arrest queers, you know…”

It shouldn’t have surprised him. The sentiment wasn’t new. Will was all too familiar with the hatred directed at people even just thought to be gay. He’d had more run-ins with bullies over the matter than he could count, and his own father had spread his concerns around Hawkins’ adult population for ages before he’d finally packed up and left for good. Will was no stranger to the dangers of being gay.

But outside the initial panic he’d suffered upon realizing he found Mike’s smile cute in he same way El did, Will had been relatively hopeful. He had his mom, at least. His mom loved him enough to brave alternate dimensions and Lovecraftian overlords; surely she wouldn’t hate him just for being gay, right?                                   

(A tiny, but not insignificant part of him whispered that maybe it would have been better if she hadn’t. Maybe, once she knew, she would wish she’d left him in the Upside Down. Dead, but at least not gay.)

He hadn’t thought to factor in Hopper. Why would he? Sure, the chief had been spending more and more time at their house since, well, _since_ , but he still wasn’t family.

( _Yet_ , his brain supplied. Give it another year or so, and Will would bet money he’d be calling the chief, “dad.”)

It was one thing to tell his mom. He was about eighty percent sure she wouldn’t disown him for it, but Hopper…

Will looked up to Hopper. He looked up to him in ways he never could Lonnie. Even Bob, who Will had genuinely liked, hadn’t been able garner the same amount of admiration. There was just something about Hopper – something that tied inexplicably to life-saving breaths and a year’s worth of doctor’s appointments – that placed the man on a pedestal so high only Joyce and Jonathan could ever surpass him.

But Hopper thought queers were bad. He thought they were wrong. Will had heard it all before from Lonnie, and Troy, and James, and every other bully, but they weren’t Hopper. It didn’t matter what they thought, but if Hopper agreed with them then it must be true.

_He was disgusting. A fairy. Queer. Wrong._

They were right. They were all right. The butterflies left over from Mike’s smile transformed into bubbles of overwhelming nausea. His breath came out in short bursts, and he settled into a state of dizzying lightheadedness. The room swam. Somewhere in the house he heard his mother scoff.

_His mother…_

Joyce relied on the chief. He was the only peer she could talk to that didn’t think her insane. Even after Bob entered her life, Joyce needed Hopper, and once Bob _exited_ her life, she needed him even more. But this…it wouldn’t matter now that they’d fought off monsters together. He’d leave. He’d leave just like Lonnie, and Joyce would be alone again.

_They’d_ be alone. Prey to the monsters of Hawkins and hell dimensions alike.

And it would be all Will’s fault. Again.

He couldn’t breathe.

“Honey?” His mother’s voice broke through the panicked fog that had settled over him. He whipped his head around to the kitchen entrance where his mother and Hopper stood observing him with concern. “Are you okay?”

_I’m fine_ , Will wanted to say, but the words got lost on his tongue. It was as if he was back in the Upside Down with the monster’s tendril shoved down his throat. His heart beat wildly against his chest, fingers shaking with adrenaline and mouth oversaturated with saliva. He was hot – too hot – like burning inside Hopper’s cabin. If Hopper wouldn’t accept him – if his mom wouldn’t accept him – then he might as well have stayed dead.

“Kid?” Hopper took a step forward. His boots creaked against the old wood floor and Will found himself involuntarily backing away. A sharp jab at his spine alerted him to the pressure of the open door digging into his flesh. Summer air wafted sweetly under his nose. Hopper’s brow furrowed. “Will? Hey, kid, what happened?”

_What happened? I’m gay. I’m a faggot – a fairy – a queer. I’m disgusting. And once you know you’ll leave. You’ll leave me and mom and…and…_

Will didn’t even realize it as he bolted out the door, feet pounding against the dirt. The sky had since grown overcast, hints of a summer storm on the horizon, and the sweetness he’d tasted was now heavy and cloying. Behind him, someone shouted and Will heard the telltale sound of a person chasing him down. The woods grew darker, branches reaching out like craggily limbs waiting to snatch him, and in an instant Will wasn’t fourteen – he was twelve, helpless and alone with nothing for miles except a monster on the hunt.

He couldn’t let it catch him. He had to escape. He had to get away.

Will picked up the pace, trees whipping past at a blur. A faint drizzle misted against his face and clothes, but he ignored it, sneakers growing muddy beneath him. He tripped and staggered as the leaves grew slick, and through the pounding of his heart he kept one ear trained to the wind listening for the monster. He could still hear it crashing through the underbrush 

In the distance, his mother called his name frantically. She was too far away; she’d never get to him before the Demogorgon did. For some reason, this filled Will with relief. He didn’t want to be found.

Why didn’t he want her to find him, again?

The pounding of the Demogorgon grew louder and Will forced his mother from his mind. His breaths came out in ragged gasps, lungs burning with each inhalation. Up ahead the trees thinned, opening into a small clearing awash with mud and vines and the ever-present slime of the Upside Down. In the center stood a small wooden fort with the name _Castle Byers_ written in marker above the entranceway. Another plank of wood with the words _All Friends Welcome_ was positioned beside it, angled in such a way as to make one wonder if it were about to fall off.

(Funny, he thought it’d been destroyed.) 

Will pushed forward, barely registering the sting in his throat and the painful pulsing of his heart. He was shaking, from fear or adrenaline he couldn’t tell. The only thing he was aware of was the castle. He had to get to the castle. The castle was safe. It was always safe. No monster could get him there 

( _It could. It did. The monster always got him. It always found him. And then he died.)_

He was almost there. Just a few more feet and he’d be safe. Just a few more–

Something barreled into him from behind. Its arms, large and all encompassing, curled around Will’s chest, stealing the breath from his lungs. He gasped, fear roiling in his stomach.

The Demogorgon! It found him!

He screamed, and the monster roared in reply. Panic overrode his fatigue as Will twisted and kicked with all his might. He wrapped his fingers around the Demogorgon’s arms, scratching them with the nubs of his nails and biting as hard as he could, fighting to escape its iron hold. He had to get away. He had to get away! He couldn’t go back there. Please, please don’t make him go back there!

Unbeknownst to him, his mouth began to form the words. “Please, please,” he croaked over and over, so low as to be inaudible against the rain.

The monster tightened its hold. It wasn’t going to let him go. It would never let him go.

Will’s muscles grew weak, the revelation settling over him like a noose. It would never let him go. He’d never be free so why did he keep fighting? He should have stayed in the Upside Down. Everything would have been easier if he’d just stayed.

Will’s legs collapsed, pulling both himself and the Demogorgon into the mud. He had just a second to recognize the burning in the back of his throat and the pressure behind his eyes before he was sobbing, desperate cries tearing from his lips. He was going to die. He should die. He should have been dead years ago. It would just be better for everyone if he ( _wrong, queer, fairy, faggot, freak_ ) died.

“-ill!” Something roared in his ear. The Demogorgon? No. He knew this voice. How did he know this voice? “Wi–!”

The Upside Down flickered around him. _Blink_. The Upside Down. _Blink_. The woods. _Blink_. _Blink_. _Blink_.

“Will!” Who’s voice was that? “Will! Hey! It’s okay. I got’cha, kid. I got you.” What? Who–?

The arms around his chest were suddenly too large to belong to the Demogorgon. They pressed around him, but there was no pain, holding him in place without trapping him. Hair prickled under Will’s chin and a muscular chest pressed against his back.

It was warm. So warm, and Will was suddenly aware of just how cold he was. He shivered, the Upside Down retreating back into his bones. Through his tears he could just make out the rain and the perfectly intact visage of Castle Byers – whole and wet and clear of grime. He was in the woods. He was fourteen. And he hadn’t been to the Upside Down in months. 

“Will?” The voice was gruff, low in Will’s ear as if the speaker was afraid that talking any louder would scare him off. If Will had the energy he may have appreciated it. As it were, all Will could do was curl up in an attempt to keep himself together. 

“Hey, hey, it’s okay, kid. It’s okay. I’m here. You’re safe, Will. You’re safe.” No, no he wasn’t safe. Will would never be safe. There were monsters out to get him. Monsters called Demogorgons and Mind Flayers and Lonnie and Troy and James and–

Hopper.

The boy stilled. Ragged gasps tumbled from his mouth as the tears slowed, leaving salty red tracks on his cheeks for the rain to wash away. He angled his face and met the chief’s eyes. They were soothing – a cornflower blue shining brightly against the darkness of the forest. His brow was wrinkled with concern and his chest undulated against Will as he fought to catch his breath. Why? Why was Hopper here? It was one thing for his mother to chase after him, but Hopper was under no such obligation.

“Will? You with me, kid?” Will gave a shaky nod. Something cleared in Hopper’s face and he relaxed his hold. It wasn’t enough to let Will go, but it felt less like a restraint and more an attempt at comfort.

There was a long pause as both of them fought to collect themselves. It stretched on into the edges of awkwardness, but still Hopper didn’t let the boy go. Will didn’t know if it was a conscious decision on the chief’s part, but he relished in the feeling of Hopper’s warm arms around him, desperate to ignore the little voice in the back of his head that echoed _if he knew, if he knew, if he knew._

Will bit his lip to stem the new wave of tears threatening to break through.

“So,” Hopper drawled out. “You wanna talk about it?” Will shook his head vigorously, burying his face in the chief’s broad chest as if doing so would hide his shame. He felt the man nod against the top of his head. “Okay, that’s okay.” Hopper patted his back in some sort of attempted reassurance.

They sat in silence for another few minutes, rain pouring down on top of them. Cold mud pressed into Will’s bare legs and he shuddered at the sensation. Cold, heat – Will had a plethora of issues revolving around extreme temperatures on both ends of the spectrum. It was all he could do to keep himself from slipping back into the Upside Down. Frigid mud flickered into viscous membrane and Will swallowed down bile.

_Not there. Not there. Not there._

His panic must have shown because Hopper suddenly shifted so he was sitting fully in the mud with Will gathered on his lap. It was strange, but not unpleasant. Certainly it gave him something else to focus on.

Something like Hopper. Hopper, who smelled of cigarette smoke and cheap cologne. Who sat here with rain pouring down his face. Who held Will as he would El or the daughter he never talked about. Hopper, who wouldn’t even be touching him if he knew what Will was.

_Queer. Faggot. Fairy. Wrong. Freak._

“Kid?” Concern bled through the chief’s gruff, and it took a moment for Will to realize it was because his fingers had curled themselves around Hopper shirt. They twisted the tan cloth, bunching it into soaked bundles only a miracle could fix.

_If he knew, if he knew, if he knew._

“I know you said you didn’t wanna talk, but if it’s something I need to know about, I’d like a heads up.”

_What?_ Will’s eyebrows crinkled together and it took an embarrassingly long time for him to realize Hopper thought this was something Upside Down-related, which, _yeah_ , there was that, but no. For the first time in forever, the Upside Down wasn’t the worst thing about Will Byers’ life. 

“Will–”

“No.” Will shook his head, wincing at the choked quality of his own voice. “No, it-it’s not–” _it’s not the Upside Down. It’s me._

“Okay,” Hopper nodded. His hands gripped Will’s arms tightly. “Okay. Did something happen at the pool?”

Will almost asked how Hopper knew he’d been at the pool, but figured his mother must have mentioned it.

Oh God, his mother...

“Mom!” He jolted upwards in Hopper’s hold, sliding a bit against the rain, and almost starling the chief into letting him go.

“Whoa, hey, kid!” Hopper held the struggling boy still. “Calm down. Your mom’s fine. She’s, _ah_ , at the house.” Embarrassment bled into his word, and Will would have wondered at how he managed to convince his mother to turn back and wait there if he wasn’t fighting the anxiety her absence instilled.

Why though? Joyce was arguably worse. At least being rejected by Hopper wouldn’t mean being homeless. So why did he want her so badly?

( _She’s mom. Mom makes everything better._ )

“Okay, so the pool,” the chief continued, unaware of Will’s roiling thoughts. “Did you see something? 

The pool? No, he hadn’t seen anything at the pool.

( _Well, he did see Lucas’ very nice muscles, and Mike’s freckled shoulders, and Dustin’s sun-kissed curls, and as much as he despised Billy, Will couldn’t deny he was a very attractive person, if only on the surface.)_

The only thing at the pool that would concern Hopper was Will. Will, who no matter how hard he tried, couldn’t bring himself to think of girls as anything other than aesthetically pleasing. Will, whose preferences were so obvious, everyone in Hawkins had known before he did. Will, who was completely, undeniably, and ashamedly gay.

If the boy were paying attention, he would have noticed the unease that clouded Hopper’s face and the razor-sharp protective glint that entered his eyes as Will’s silence stretched. He would have noticed the way his hold tightened – the way Hopper’s hand moved from his arm to the crown of his head. He would have felt the gentle, soothing circles of the chief’s thumb on his back.

But Will wasn’t paying attention. He couldn’t. All he could do was focus on the pounding of his heart, each beat screaming out a mantra of condemnation.

_Gay, gay, gay, gay, gay._

Who would rescue him if Hopper found out? His mother was at home. Jonathan was with Nancy, and his friends only ignored the rumors because they thought they were untrue.

But they weren’t untrue and Hopper hated queers. He thought they were wrong. Will was queer. Therefore, Hopper would hate Will. It was basic math and he was going to be sick.

Will spun around, throwing up over the edge of Hopper’s crossed ankles. The acrid scent stung his nose, snot dripping down over his lips as if to emphasize just how much of a pathetic mess he was. A lump formed in the back of his throat and the unwanted pressure of more tears built up until he could no longer hold them back. He couldn’t even pass them off as rain drops anymore, not now that the downpour had passed. His only saving grace was that at least he’d managed to avoid making a mess of Hopper’s shirt; the last thing he wanted to do was anger the chief for something he _could_ control.

“Shit,” he heard Hopper mutter before he was once more gathered close. “Alright, buddy. It’s alright. There we go, let it out,” he soothed as Will continued his panicked purging. “Whatever’s wrong we’ll fix it, okay?”

“No,” Will moaned. His gasps were truncated and punctuated with stutters. Acidic bile sat like tang on his tongue.

“No? You don’t want it fixed?”

Will shook his head. “You can’t.” Because if this was something that could be fixed, someone would have done it already 

“I can’t, huh? Well, if you still think like that then you haven’t been paying much attention, have you?” It was meant to be teasing; an attempt at levity, but it fell flat against Will’s hiccuping breaths. Hopper sighed. “Alright, so it can’t be fixed. Want to tell me why?”

“Because.”

“Because? I’m gonna need a little more than that, kid.”

Will shook his head again, more forcefully this time. _Shut up, shut up, shut up_ , but the words were out of his mouth before he could stop them. “Because it’s m-me.” _Leave it_ , he prayed, even as he cursed himself. Hopper was like a bloodhound; once he had a scent he wouldn’t let up until he got what he wanted.

_He’s going to leave you. It’s written all over your face. If only he hadn’t brought you back,_ the little voice in his head whispered again. It sounded suspiciously like the Mind Flayer.

“You?” Hopper questioned, just as Will hoped he wouldn’t. “You can’t be fixed?”

Will shuddered and once more buried his face in Hopper’s soggy shirt. He clamped his eyes shut, as much to stem the tears as he was unwilling to look at the chief when he inevitably figured it out; Will just wasn’t strong enough to watch that familiar glint of disgust in another father’s eyes. His body quivered, mud beginning to dry around his legs, but he ignored the itching in favor of curling even further against Hopper’s chest. The boy wanted to absorb as much warmth as he could before Hopper left for good.

“Will? Hey, wanna tell me why you think you can’t be fixed?” Hopper asked. It was the same voice Will associated with the lab and three AM hot chocolate therapy – gentle, but with a hint of pensive fishing.

“Because I’m a freak,” Will rasped into the cloth. He wasn’t even an acceptable freak like Jonathan – one with a girlfriend. No, Will just happened to be the type of freak that was still illegal in most parts of the world.

And that wasn’t even getting into all the supernatural shit, but that, at least, Hopper accepted.

(Another person might have balked that possession via interdimensional eldritch abomination was somehow more socially acceptable than attraction to someone of the same gender, but it wasn’t like Will could escape to _another_ dimension (and the fact that he almost longed for the Upside Down was duly ignored).)

“You’re a freak, huh?” Hopper’s hand awkwardly stroked his hair. “Well, I hate to tell you this, but you’re surrounded by freaks and we all seem to get by just fine.” Will choked out a laugh that dissolved into a phlegmy sob somewhere between the boy’s mouth and Hopper’s chest because Hopper _just didn’t get it_.

“N-not the same.” _Shut up, shut up_

“Not the same? Really? Kid, I’ve seen you possessed and I willingly live with a girl who can kill people with her mind. I don’t think anything you say is gonna beat that.”

_It might_ , Will thought. Though, to be fair, Hopper had a point. It wasn’t like Will was shooting fireballs. _But the True Sight hasn’t stopped,_ the Mind Flayer’s voice muttered, _and there have been instances – no! Stop._ Will wasn’t ready to open that can of worms just yet. If not for Mike’s stupid smile he wouldn’t have even opened this one.

“Did someone say something to you?” Will shrugged, not trusting himself to speak. “Ah, kid you gotta give me something to work with here.”

“You’re going to hate me,” the boy whispered. _Shut. Up._

Hopper stilled. “Hate you? Will, I don’t know what’s going through your head right now, but no matter what you think you did it’s not gonna make me hate you.”

“It will, though,” Will choked. “You’ll hate me!”

“Look, unless you’re going around killing people, I’m not going to hate you. ”

Will let out a shuddering breath. “Yes, you will. You will and then you’ll leave and–”

“Leave? What-?”

“You will! You’ll leave and mom will be all alone!” The boy cried. “She’ll be alone and it will be all my fault ‘cause I’m a freak and I already took Bob away, and now I’m going to take you too and-and–”

“Kid, kid, hey,” Hopper tried. When the boy didn’t calm, he gripped Will’s shoulders and shook. “Will!” He forced the boy to look up at him. “Now, I don’t know what you think you did that’s so bad it’s going to make me leave, but whatever it is, I can assure you it’s not–”

“I’m gay!”

Silence.

Petrichor drifted along the breeze and the only sounds in the clearing came from the sporadic dripping of water and Will’s heavy breathing. They stared at each other – Hopper’s shocked blues against Will’s red-rimmed hazel, the creeping sensation of churning horror all that stood between the boy and blinding numbness.

He hadn’t meant to say that. He had not meant to say that. It just spilled out. It just–

Oh, _fuck_.

It was too much, much too much. Will couldn’t breath. The world was spinning, colors blurring together and sounds drowning under the thundering of his own heartbeat. _Not Hopper, not Hopper._ He wanted his mom. He wanted to tell her _first_. She was supposed to be first. Oh, god. What was he going to do? If he couldn’t even keep it to himself for an hour, what hope did he have for the rest of his life? The entire town would surely know by tomorrow and his mother would be planning his actual funeral by week’s end.

(And it was so real. Only now did he realize he hadn’t said it out loud yet. In his head it could be denied, but aloud it suddenly became incontrovertible truth, one that would follow him throughout the rest of his life.)

Hopper was silent. His arms laxed against Will’s shoulders.

This was it. He was going to leave. Will tensed in preparation. Would he yell? Would he hit him? Would he just shove him away? Hopper wasn’t mom. Hopper wasn’t obligated to stay.

And even mom might leave him in the end.

_I’m sorry, mom. I’m so sorry. I’m sorryI’msorryI’msorry…_

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry…” He sobbed into the muggy air. His face hovered above Hopper’s chest; millimeters short of actually touching for fear that would be the final nail in the coffin. He couldn’t risk it.

Will didn’t notice as Hopper’s hand rose to cup the back of his head. He didn’t notice as he was gently pulled to settle against damp cloth. He didn’t notice as Hopper began to rub his back. He didn’t notice anything.

This was his punishment for surviving. It had to be.

_Gay, queer, fairy, faggot, freak._

“I’m sorry,” Will rambled. Tears carved tracks into his cheeks. “I’m sorry. I tried. I tried to like girls. I promise. And-and I’ll keep trying. I will. Just…please don’t leave. Please don’t leave mom. She needs you and-and I already took away Bob. I can’t-I can’t take you away, too. Please. I promise, I’ll be normal. I’ll be normal. I promise, Hopper. I promise, I promise, I prom–”

“Will.” The boy took in a shuddering breath. “Breathe. Now, I’m not gonna pretend to understand… _this_ , but I’m not going to leave. Alright? I’m not going to leave.” He patted the top of Will’s head awkwardly, only now drawing the boy’s attention to the comfort. It only made his eyes burn.

Will’s lips quivered. “But you will.” His dad left. Bob left. Hopper would leave, too.

“I won’t. You hear me, kid? I won’t.”

“But I’m,” Will lowered his voice to barely a whisper, “ _queer_.”

Hopper squirmed uncomfortably against him. “Yeah, well, we’ll figure something out, right? We’ve fought worse monsters.”

“Can’t fight this.”

“Hey, you never know until you try,” Hopper said with obvious discomfort. “We’ll figure it out, kid. I don’t-I don’t get it, but we’ll figure it out.”

Will hiccuped. He wasn’t sure he wanted to figure it out. All he really wanted was to bury it back up and never think about it again. But there was something about the way Hopper held him – gentle, like his mom, with a hand stroking his hair – that made Will want to believe him. “You think so?”

“Yeah, I do.”

“And-and you won’t leave?”

The hand atop his head stilled for the barest second before Will was suddenly pulled deeper into Hopper’s embrace. It was…warm. Warm, and incredibly safe. “I won’t leave, Will.”

“Promise?”

Hopper’s hold tightened. “I promise.”

It wasn’t perfect, but Will allowed himself to hope.

**Author's Note:**

> And there you go! Don't worry, Hopper does eventually come around to the fact that Will is gay, that there is nothing wrong with that, and he will definitely fight anyone who dares say a single negative word about it. He doesn't actually try to "fix" him. But unfortunately, Hopper is a typical 1980s man in rural Indiana, and we've seen him show some homophobia in the first season (not anything big, but you could tell it was there). But he'll learn. This is just the first step of many. And I also don't think Will would come out to anyone other than his mother or Jonathan first, but the idea wouldn't leave my head. 
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this and please leave a review! I'd love to know your thoughts and what you think could be improved. Thank you for reading!


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